You’re working nights at a convenience store (fast food resturant), we have placed you on the food chain. I will say it again, slowly…

I have used this. It is actually a favorite.

Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again…

I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.

I see you’ve set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.

I like you.  You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

What am I?  Flypaper for freaks!?

I’m not being rude.  You’re just insignificant.

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.

Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

Nice perfume.  Must you marinate in it?

Errors have been made.  Others will be blamed.