Wednesday, June 22, 2005
Misnomer No More, Miss
Well things have been pretty heavy lately here at the ‘hut. I’ve been getting all maudlin and drippy and, ya know, not actually very chuckly. And that’s a darn shame, because I’ve seen one hell of a lot of funny stuff on line lately. I just added Steve the Sneeze to my blogroll list, he’s good for many laughs; and the “Best of Craigs List” is on the sidebar now as well; there was the “happy the dog” video that I’m not finding again right now but really, it’s hilariously cautionary, and of course there’s spiderman rating a bunch of crayons. Frankly, there’s a dad-blame passel of funny crap out there to waste time on, and here I am calling myself “chuckles” and making people get all emotional and engaged and whatnot. Is this false advertising? So far this week, yes it is - notwithstanding the embarassing pictures of myself as a child. In light whereof, I’m going to take the unprecedented step of… well, I’m not sure what this is, but it’s time to post it so here goes.
You remember the Honeydrippers? In the early ‘80s, Robert Plant indulged his affinity for olde-fashioned U.S. r&b by assembling a superstar band, which wound up releasing one album and doing one fairly successful tour. This enticed any number of other bands to seek their fortune by imitating the ‘drippers sound and style, hoping to capitalize on their success and audience. Unfortunately, Plant’s resumption of a solo career put the Honeydrippers out of business and left the knockoff bands high and dry, never to get a chance to scam his audience with their rehashed and shopworn music. They were mercenary and unimaginative - but that’s no reason to deny them the recognition that is their due. If Bo Bice gets to be famous, then these guys do too. Here, then, is a list of bands that would have tried to capitalize on the popularity of The Honeydrippers but never got a recording contract:
* The Sugar Shovelers
* The Simple Syrup Swizzlers
* The Children’s Dimetapp Droppers
* The Karo Cornholers
* The Gelato Samplers
* The Antifreeze Puddlers
* The Royal Jelly Vialsuckers
* The Duck Saucers
* The Sor Ghummers
* The Sugar Beeters
* The Marshmallow Fluffers
* The Seeping Genitals
Too far? okay, I think that’s about all for now, then. I’ll put up some weird photos tomorrow. Till then, keep rockin’, or whatever it is you’re doing over there. But you may want to close those shades. I still think the neighbors can see you.
