Thursday, January 02, 2003

Noisy parties can be such

Noisy parties can be such an impediment to effective communication.  Just when you need the subtlty of inflection, the distinctive difference between a short vowel and a schwa, just when mispronouncing an umlaut can be most deleterious for one’s social agenda and continuing personal growth - that’s when the overwhelming wall of festive sound can render you not only unheard, but potentially misunderstood and derided by strangers.  For those attending parties with a goal in mind other than to be ignored or humiliated, Ohbalto directs us to these easy signals that can help you make every party a personal success. 

My question is this: what other signs need to be developed?  I was thinking of ones such as: “I’m Superman - you Jane”, “I’ll be your best friend,” “Can you open this zipper for me?,” and “Those goddamn liberals are ruining the country”.  Submissions for additional signals are now being accepted.