Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Shopping Bags

I suspect it’s not a trend; it’s probably something that’s been happening all along and I’m just finally noticing it: but I’m seeing more and more women of style and fashion, and otherwise, carrying around little paper shopping bags instead of a purse.  They’ve got a book, some lunch, letters and cards, a broad selection of small items in a crisp laminated sack with a rope handle and some company’s name on the side as they ride my bus or walk the downtown streets.

And when I see someone with one of these little sacks I can’t help but think that she’s got the sack because she lives the lifestyle, she’s bought something there and re-uses the sack as a enduring reminder to herself of the pleasure that commercial relationship has brought her.  If it’s a bag from Kiehl’s or Lush, I think of her enjoying her cosmetics.  If it’s from the Apple store, I look for the white wires for her earbuds.  Stacey’s?  Books.  Flax?  Art.  The bag is a window on the woman - one I know to offer a warped, if not actually misleading, perspective, but I attend to it anyway.  Those cool civets strolling up Kearney with a tuna sandwich and an Evanovitch mystery in their little blue bag from Tiffany just look more refined, more sophisticated.  The Prada bag says, “I paid too much for my purse;” the Ferragamo bag says, “I paid too much for my shoes and I don’t care about my purse.” And that’s cool.  The aura of narcissistic consumerism carries through.  I see the shopper; I imagine the product. 

The downside is, I’m also seeing a lot of women walking around like this using their Victoria’s Secret bags as their personal totes.  And here’s the thing: as often as I’m titilated by the notion of some of these women in their unmentionables, it seems that just as often, if not moreso, it’s an image I would be happier never to have been brought to my mind.  A few days ago I was unfortunate enough to see a remarkably ugly woman of advanced maturity with her equally hideous overgrown enfant terrible of a daughter together on the bus, standing in front of the exit door, talking loudly and stupidly, wearing too much makeup and perfume but still possessed of an essential vileness that transcended cosmetic amelioration, sneering and complaining and obstructing the free flow of public karma, both carrying large bags from VS overstuffed with the cheap paraphenalia of their tawdry lives - and it made a painful and unwelcome impression upon my overimpressionable self.  Ladies, I am glad - yes, glad! - that you’ve found a way to feel good about yourselves all under or whereever it is you feel the way Victoria secretly wants you to feel, but that is no excuse for evoking this kind of imagery in my already overwrought head.  I’d been minding my own business and suddenly I can’t rid myself of the picture of your two unpleasant selves criminally overexposed in camisoles and bustiers, still whining about each other’s friends and getting in people’s way and picking biomass from your respective ears and nostrils.  The thought was so distasteful to me that I had to go and find a woman with a big shopping bag from BevMo so I could take a nice deep mental draught of the clean bite of alcoholic amnesia.  I’m not about to suggest that some people wear their shopping bags on their heads; that would be vindictive and just plain meanspirited of me.  But if you have to carry a bag that creates such vivid and disturbing imagery for those around you, please have the decency to offer us a stiff drink while you’re at it.  I’d consider it a public service.

At least you weren’t envisioning them in a VS thong or v-string. The ones with jewels or other ornamentation on the strap. (shudder)

I know the Vickie’s inventory well. My husband works for them and gets a catalog every freakin week. There are certain items that should require an application and approval before one is permitted to buy the article.

all i can say, my friend, is : OY.  i feel your pain.

That is hilarious. Fun to have a peek inside a man’s brain about something like that.

I am so overwhelmingly self-obsessed I can’t even imagine noticing this shit.  You amaze me as always.

For some reason this got converted into a painting in my head. A Wayne Thiebaud sort of thing. A thickly layered tableau of colorful women clutching their paper personas and the title would be “Bag Ladies.”

All of which has little to do with the point you’re making, but anyway, heh??

Ya know, I have had that exact same problem. I suffer from an overactive imagination. Sometimes it really makes life hard for me!

I see that a lot at work, too, and I admit that I do it myself. Basically, it’s the product of having too much stuff for my small purse and being too cheap for a briefcase or something nice of that nature.

what I notice around here is that people use the same ol’ tired, worn out bag from Tiffany or whatever for - like - years to carry their cup o’noodle or Lean Cuisine. It’s like they’re saying “I have tons of money to flaunt - I just REALLY like ramen noodles, but don’t worry, I LOVE Tiffany… and Prada too...” gah.

I guess it says a lot about me that I either have 1) a plain white handle bag or 2) a Trader Joe’s bag

Oh I truly understand how annoying it gets. Had that woman just stayed quiet she probably wouldn’t be noticed and be blogged about.

just surfin’. interesting blog. :)

It is a little embarrassing that, after 45 years of research and study, the best advice I can give to people is to be a little kinder to each other. by world series of poker