Monday, October 26, 2009
Spooky and Shiny
That gentle stirring of the cosmic soup is me, starting to move around again. Let’s not go crazy with it now, though - we’ll re-initiate activities slowly and gently, so as not excessively to shock my system. That’s what I tried last time and it landed me in horktown for a solid week. So now I’m looking for ways to make things easy on myself.
Here’s one good example of that: Halloween is coming up, as they tell me, soon, and bald dads like me will be expected to get thematic right along with our kids (Zach will be Plex from one of his preferred shows, Yo Gabba Gabba, and Jesse finally has a devil costume to complement his essential inner nature.) Bald guys should have it easy as far as costumes are concerned, since there are quite a few characters who can be fully invoked without much effort beyond a shiny scalp. So, for my own future reference as well as my present convenience, I’m stockpiling here and now a ...
LIST OF SIMPLE COSTUME IDEAS FOR BALD MEN
Mr Clean (white t-shirt and pants, bulging forearms)
Kojak (Blazer, necktie, lollypop, parking space directly in front)
Lex Luthor (Blazer, cruelty, kryptonite)
Dr Manhattan (hydro-atom on forehead; blue and nude; capacity to self-replicate infinitely and to assume gargantuan size)
Howie Mandel (blazer, soul patch, twenty-six leggy models carrying briefcases)
Mt Baldy (t-shirt emblazoned with legend, “Mount Me")
After that they become distasteful, although quite simple. Anyway, these ought to get me through 2014. After that I’ll probably have hair again or something. No plans that far in the future are worth the internet script it takes to predict them. Like, who knew I’d still be typing this drek? ouch....
