Thursday, December 19, 2002

I’ve been writing a lot

I’ve been writing a lot of long heavy stuff but I don’t have time to post anything meaty.  So instead I’ll assault your sensabilities with this work-in-progress list.  I mentioned a few of these to Kel and she told me it sounded “very Letterman.” That slowed me down but I’ve decided there are worse things to be.  When I start posting stuff that’s “very ‘Touched by an Angel’” I’ll have something to worry about.  Unless this is some different kind of touching.  I did say ‘angel’ after all. 

Regardless, and in random order:
XMAS TRADITIONS THAT NEVER REALLY CAUGHT ON
Ornament Hurling
Turkey with Cherry Bomb Stuffing
Naked Carolling
Sucret Santa: the office cold-remedy exchange
Chimney-mounted Santa Snares
Reindeer Steak
Igniting the Tree on X-mas Morning
Barracading the Family in the Yule Bunker
Lard Nog
Carolling ‘Favorite Wehrmacht Marches’
Hanging Ornaments from Body Piercings
Peppermung Sticks
Human Hair Yule Log
Elf Loaf
Strippletoe
Body Flocking
Setting Out Tranqs and Bourbon for Santa
Decking the Halls with Boughs of Stinkweed
It’s a Miserable Life
Yule Floss
The Gift-Stomping Polka
Sterno Figgy Pudding Football
Naked Nativity Pantomimes
Sanka Claus
The X-Men